By Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D.
“Nothing has meaning other than the meaning we give it.” You may have heard this before or some variation of it.
The essence of this statement is that: what we see is that which we project. You see we can’t see that which didn’t at one point reside within.
Deepak Chopra use to site the following research, which says it so nicely.
There was a group of cats who where placed, from birth, in a room with horizontal lines covering the walls …all four walls of this room.
The cats sensory neurons assimilated horizontal lines. Period.
Subsequent to this development, the cats were placed in another room in which there where chairs situated about. And the cats walked right into the legs of the chairs.
They couldn’t see the vertical lines as this neuro-sensory path had not been established within them.
We see that which is already within us. That’s all we can see. The reason we see what we see is because it is indeed within!
Now, let’s bring this home and tie back to my opening comment about projection and our earlier discussion on self-compassion.
If the meaning we give something truly originates from within, our experience will drive the way we process the world, how we take it in….the meaning we give it. This is the essence of projection.
When I would go through all the self-protection “cloak-and-dagger” routine, I used to get angry with myself and still to this day when I see even the slightest remnants of it, the ordeal actually sickens me. Why because the meaning I give all this behavior and the feelings associated with it. That being I am a victim. I have to “protect myself from the potential onslaught of another.”
Yet when I take an article that is on my MAC and email it to myself so I may pick it up on my PC where I do all of my web design, I don’t get that “sickish/angry/pathetic” feeling.
Oh yea it might be a hassle. But it’s how I learned to adapt to spyware, adaware and computer viruses. I made a decision last year that I would separate my work product from the Internet.
And my mindset is occasionally…this is a hassle, but never that yukie feeling, even though I’m “protecting myself from the potential onslaught of another.”
Nothing has meaning other than the meaning we give it. Think about it.
Now the best part of this insight is coming: we get to choose our thoughts!
To be continued….Bridging psychology and domestic abuse advocacy.
Next month is National Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Be aware!
Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D. is a psychologist, author, speaker and leading expert in identifying intimate partner violence. Author of All But My Soul, Dr. King developed the Intimate Partner Abuse Screen, available online at www.PreventAbusiveRelationships.com to help people properly identify and stop domestic abuse. For expert consulting on issues pertaining to healing for abusive relationships, visit www.DrJeanneKing.com Dr. Jeanne King Consultants, LLC
©Copyright 2007 Dr. Jeanne King Consultants, LLC www.PreventAbusiveRelationships.com All Rights Reserved.
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This entry was posted on Friday, September 21st, 2007 at 11:49 am and is filed under Healing Insights. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
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