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Archive for September, 2011

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Abusive Relationship Help – Why You Don’t Ask for What You Want in Abusive Relationships

Monday, September 26th, 2011

by Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D.

Why is it that the things you want the most are the hardest to ask for from your partner? In domestic abuse therapy, I see people come into treatment knowing what they want from their partner and intentionally avoiding directly asking for it from him/her.

It’s like…if they don’t ask, they don’t have to be concerned about the rejection they may feel in not getting what they request. So, instead they hide behind holding their fantasy that their partner should know “the want” and “the how” of their desires.

To read the complete article, please visit Abusive Relationship Help – Why You Don’t Ask for What You Want in Abusive Relationships 

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Domestic Abuse Prevention – The Curse and the Glory of the Violence Trigger

Thursday, September 22nd, 2011

by Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D.

Batterers are often unaware of what sends them into their rants. And when the episode is over, it becomes a blur with the golden nugget left in the confusion.

The Curse of the Trigger

The golden nugget is the trigger, and recognizing it is key to domestic abuse prevention. In working with batterers, I’ve noticed that the clearer they are on the thoughts and feelings leading up to the altercation, the easier it is for them to break the cycle of abuse.

To read the complete article, please visit Domestic Abuse Prevention – The Curse and the Glory of the Violence Trigger

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Domestic Violence Abuse Injury – Has Your Partner’s Actions or Words Touched a Wound Within You?

Saturday, September 17th, 2011

by Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D.

We hear that any action that causes any arousal whatsoever beyond a natural physiological response occurs because the action has touched a wound within you. What does this mean and how is it relevant to domestic violence survivors?

Have you ever heard your abusive partner tell you that there is something wrong with you because you still hurt months or even years after he/she did such and such? We hear that question as though we are responsible for the feelings of being abused and somehow thereby—the abuse. However, I’m here to tell you that this conclusion is simply not true!

To read the complete article, please visit Domestic Violence Abuse Injury – Has Your Partner’s Actions or Words Touched a Wound Within You?

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